Choose Your Own Adventure - Blog Post

Being single is a bit like those choose your own adventure books. 

As September creeps in and the slightest chill in the evenings beckons, I know that my own season of adventure is upon me. Somehow September has become my month of choice. This time last year I was moving home, buying a new bike and heading to Barcelona... 

This time is so much more – I have created my own Magical Mystery Tour to include Jersey, a festival with my sisterhood, a Cacao ceremony with my tribe, a dieta of my own, 10 days in glorious Ibiza where I will practice yoga daily, lie on the beach and sit in the circle of the Mamitas and my familia once again. Then back to my roots in Jersey before rounding up with a weekend with the Shaman as I integrate all I have done with one magical month. 

I find myself pulsing with excitement just contemplating it, thinking about the space I am creating for myself.  

I remember in the Ayahuasca ceremony when I asked her who I was, she responded, 'You are what's left after you die.' In my deepest meditations and brightest bliss, I have touched upon what that could mean. I know that I am much more than this body that holds me and this collection of data that I call my mind. I know beyond what I call me there is an awareness I can access. 

Since I have been ill I have been so much more aware of the vulnerabilities of my body and have again started meditating daily. My mornings start with the familiar voice of Sadhguru as he tells me, 'I am not the body, I am not even the mind' and somehow I am learning to distance my complex compulsions for a few seconds and find... space. I am realising finding space has become just as an exciting adventure for me!  

Recently, as I was driving back to my parent's home, suddenly I felt something in me say, 'Don't grasp on to anything'. My whole being relaxed into the motion of the car, the movement of the steering wheel, the rhythm of the traffic lights and the voices on the radio. I allowed the world to just be and simultaneously, it gave me the permission to do the same; all that was me just faded away.

The moments of awareness, the space inside the chaos and the feeling of stepping into the new... I am loving this new part of my life. September? Bring it on!

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